Surrogacy as a concept even in the 21st century brings forth certain ethical and legal complications. Myriad issues associated with assisted conception bring certain disagreements and controversy within the public opinion and scientific community. Certain critical factors come to the fore and the objectives of multiple stakeholders and players have to be taken into account.
Therefore, if you are planning on seeking the services of a gestational carrier, here are some points you must consider. Let’s start scrolling –
#This article has been written with inputs from a homosexual couple who welcomed their son via surrogacy in early 2022.
What tips you must follow for gestational surrogacy?
When you are opting for assisted conception, you must take care of the –
- Premium quality support system
Most people simply have a sketch of what this journey would be like. The reality is far from that. Therefore – you will have to find a support system of doctors, helpers, and mental health officials who will cooperate through this process, updating you on the latest development and being with you at trying times.
- Zero in on a family lawyer
The most crucial aspect of assisted pregnancy is – the legal aspect. There are domestic legal boundings (recently India updated their surrogacy laws) as well as contractual issues between the intended parents and the carrier. You must hire a family lawyer who will help you deal with all these legal issues and prepare a comprehensive plan for the baby’s parental rights.
Ensure you consult an attorney who has years of practice behind him or her and is on the same page with you about the baby’s future.
- Choose the correct hospital and medical practitioner
When dealing with surrogacy, going via the normal process is not feasible. You must choose an Ob-Gyn who creates a family-centric plan inclusive of the gestational carrier (at least till the time she is carrying and 4 months post-delivery).
Also, the hospital must be accommodating to the carrier and the intended parents without violating the privacy of either party. There must not be any legal issues associated with the hospital (since certain hospitals and domains do not allow surrogacy practice).
- Comprehend the risks of surrogacy
When you go in for the surrogacy procedure, the priority remains the gestational carrier. The couple with whose assistance this article has been framed had 4 prior procedures, before the carrier got impregnated. This increased the medical costs and surely tested their patience. Also, data states – 10-20%of the pregnancies could result in a miscarriage within the first 2 months, despite all going well.
Therefore – when you jump into this boat, prepare yourself mentally and financially to indulge it in all. You will need patience more than anything else. Therefore – it is suggested by most Ob-Gyn to sit for counseling sessions.
- Set ground rules with family and friends
When you bring a child into this world, there will be ample advice and suggestions on raising him or her. Also, most couples do have a certain sense of fear that the ‘surrogacy’ story might go up to their child in a concocted manner.
Therefore – as a couple, you must set some boundaries for your extended family and friends. Ensure that their advice feels welcoming and not burdening. There must be room for differences of opinion – it’s your child after all!
How to care for the gestational carrier?
When you are on this path of surrogacy, it will not take you much to understand the selflessness of the gestational carrier. By carrying a baby to term, the gestational carrier turns the intended parents’ far-fetched dream – into a reality. Therefore – as would-be parents, you must care for her physical and mental well-being, not just during the pregnancy but also in the post-delivery recovery stage. How would you do that? Here are some suggestions –
- Be her support system
Stating that pregnancy can be overwhelming sometimes is an understatement. It is very difficult to understand what a would-be mother undergoes, physically and mentally, during that time. What she needs is – unconditional support. Especially when she is your surrogate, you must be sensitive and understanding of her needs.
- A balance between rest and activity
The pregnant mother needs a schedule that fits both rest and activity. A light exercise schedule followed by a timebound resting period is crucial for your surrogate mother. It is better to plan out a daily schedule that will cater to her physical and mental requirements, not just in the pregnancy period, but also up to 4 months post delivery (postpartum issues occur up to a maximum of 3 months).
- Take care of the food
This is simply a reiteration of a point you are already aware of. The mother and baby, both need essential nutrients for their body. Hence, you will have to plan a diet chart for your gestational carrier which includes the essential minerals and nutrients. As for cravings? She may indulge in them but – moderation is the key!
- Consult the medical practitioner at intervals
When you opt for surrogacy, the visits to the doctors naturally increase. You may have a general idea of the physical and mental condition of your gestational carrier, but, one cannot ideally predict always on – how the pregnancy will affect her. So, regular medical checkups are executed.
But, what happens post-delivery? What about post-partum depression or physical conditions that require medical attention? Almost 6.5-20% of mothers experience this form of depression and it requires immediate medical attention. So, you must care for your gestational carrier.
Do you know?
Have you heard of the concept of procreational tourism? Well, if you are planning on having international surrogacy, then, there are countries that offer international surrogacy coated under their tourism format. The legal and moral obligations are taken care of, allowing the concerned would-be-parents a platter of choices, not available within their domestic boundaries. Colombia, Ukraine, and Mexico are some of those countries which even have guaranteed surrogacy programs for the couple.
We hope that if and when you seek surrogacy, you will consider the factors mentioned above. If you have any more queries, you may consider clicking on the website for more.